I don't know which way to go. Any advice?

Here’s my deal today

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My one and only brother is fairly irresponsible and generally a drag to be around. Not because he’s a bad person, but because he puts on this bravado that makes talking with him a negative experience. He fights with my mom A LOT. I mean, I would say a good 75 percent of her daily stress comes solely from him.

My mom is the family matriarch; she is the loom through which all of our fabric is woven. In a family where four kids come from three different dads, she’s pretty much the main thing we all have in common. Suffice it to say, when she’s upset, we’re all upset. As her eldest child and one of her closest friends, much of the stress and anxiety she deals with regarding my brother lands on me.

Most recently, my brother has taken it upon himself to throw parties at my parent’s home when they’re gone. Having walked in on one I can say without a doubt that these parties involve excessive alcohol consumption, beer pong in the kitchen, and teenagers having sex in every single bed.  After being caught (by me) my mom made my brother swear that he would not have anyone else over, otherwise he would forfeit both his cell phone and keys.

You may be able to guess what happened next. My parents arrived home from a trip to find the beds badly remade, the floor sticky with beer, and used condoms in all the bedroom trashcans. My brother’s reaction? Shame? Guilt? A plea for forgiveness? Um, no. He offered blatant lies. Really bad lies too. Things that made absolutely no sense. Things any mildly intelligent person could see right through. But on and on he went.

He still won’t admit to having a party; he “just had a few people over.

What I’ve come to realize is that I am not a girl who will ever deal with a ton of friend drama or work drama or relationship drama, but I’m up to my ears in family drama. This is the trouble with a big family and with being the oldest.  It’s neverending. It’s all encompassing. It’s completely exhausting. It makes me think twice about having kids.

update: now I am waged in a Facebook battle with my brothers friends. Dee-lite-ful!!


Written by ditheringmiss

July 14, 2009 at 4:17 pm

Posted in Family

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